(199th day, 166 more days to go)
- STOP feeling guilty about doing things for yourself especially if your kid(s) are well taken cared of.
- Have some “ME” Time often, example: take time for yourself while your kid(s) are asleep, read a book, or when you wake up in the morning…anytime will do just make sure you do it. It RE-news your spirit, RE-minds you who is most important in your life, and RE-vives your mind.
- Write a special note to your child and hide it in their backpack or lunch sack for them to find during their day at school. Remind them how much you love them.
- Find a Hobby. A good indication to why single moms need to do this is if you know way too much information about what your child’s father is or isn’t doing then it’s time to make use of your FREE time. See also “ME” Time.
- Set goals for yourself but not deadlines. Let’s face it, we have too much going on in our lives to set deadlines that are unrealistic for some of us. If it takes you 10 years to get a 4 year degree that’s fine because I did it. lol
- Take a tour of your city as if you are a tourist. You wouldn’t believe the amount of history or places you may be missing and it’s right under your nose. Here’s a website that can help you start: http://www.nileguide.com/ (NOTE: Don’t worry if the prices are too high because remember you are a resident and may know some economical ways to save. Have fun!)
- Do an activity with your child that he/she likes. For example, my daughter and I went to the dollar store and racked on some toys. We found a Sand Art project and now our studio apartment is filled with pictures.
- Check out http://www.meetup.com/ because this site offers groups that meet in your area that may have the same interests as you do OR if you want to try something new. It’s a great new way to meet new people and enjoy activities without any stress. If you’re in the Atlanta area, check this out: http://www.playdateatl.com/playdateatlanta.cfm
- Be Happy Single. Often times, we get too consumed with being alone that we stress about finding The One. Give yourself time to heal from a broken heart and of course the dumb crap you did in your last relationship. You don’t want to make the same mistakes from your past relationships or have a revolving door of men coming in and out of YOUR kid’s life and yours.
- If your child is over the age of 9, don’t be afraid to speak to them about their feelings. Sometimes, we THINK that are child is okay without having their father in their life but if you sit down an speak to them you will probably be surprised. For instance, I went to a restaurant my daughter’s father and I used to go to. I told her that we used to love going there before she was born. Her eyes lit up as if she never thought that we actually liked each other at one point. Afterwards, I took her to other spots around town and told her that although we didn’t get along before, we did love each other. Also, I told her that it’s not her fault that we were no longer together and that I want her father in her life. After speaking with her, she thought that it would make me mad if she wanted him to be in her life. From that point on, I made a promise to myself that I would never interfere with their relationship and I would leave it up to him to make ALL the effort to be in her life NOT me.
- LET IT GO! Whatever it is that you haven’t Let Go at this point, for goodness sakes, Please find a way. Check your local community to find Support Groups for Single Moms. That’s a great way to start and find an alternative to therapy. Many people prefer support groups rather than seek therapy because it can be very intimidating and costly. Some support groups are FREE so check around.